When you grow up with an Emotionally Immature Parent, being yourself isn’t an option.
Instead, you build what I call a Survivor Self—a version of you that’s smaller, quieter, and “appropriate enough” to finally earn their love and attention.
This happens due to something called Projective Identification—a concept at the heart of what I teach in Protect Your Peace.
(FYI, if you haven’t already, sign up now for Protect Your Peace before it’s gone in just 72 hours!)
Projective identification takes place when someone projects an unwanted part of themselves onto you, and without realizing it, you accept that projection and start to see it as part of who you are.
For example:
...Your parent felt shame about their own emotions, so they called you “too sensitive” (projection). Over time, you started believing your feelings were the problem (aka, you internalized a new identity as overly sensitive).
...Your parent was terrified of being judged, so they told you to “act appropriate” or “stop making a scene” (projection). Now, you feel like you’re too much or too dramatic (aka, you internalized a new identity as being too much or too dramatic).
...Your parent(s) felt ashamed of their own dreams, so they dismissed yours as silly or pointless (projection). And just like that, you started carrying their shame as if it were your own (aka, you internalized a new identity as shameful).
Do you see the dynamic here, Beloved?
Your parent didn’t like something in themselves, and instead of addressing that within, they worked it out through you.
As their unsuspecting child, you didn’t know better—you simply took in their projections as a truth about who you are.
This is why I call this work "taking yourself back"—because that’s exactly what it’s about (and exactly what I guide you through in Protect Your Peace).
So, what does healing from this look like?
It looks like learning to spot the projections in real time—so you can say, “That’s not mine to carry.”
It looks like reclaiming—with love—the parts of yourself they silenced and the ones you were conditioned to hide.
It looks like giving ALL parts of you what they never could—love, acceptance, and protection from their distortions.
I know that’s easier said than done, especially if you’ve never been shown how. And that’s where Protect Your Peace comes in.
By now, you’ve probably heard me talk about this class—a lot.
You’ve heard about the student wins, the aha moments, the weight lifting, the shift from surviving to reclaiming, etc.
You’ve also heard about the self-love masterclass that's included and the PDF workbook packed with exercises to guide you. So, I’ll spare you the repeat—you get it.
But here is what I will say:
What if we did 2025 differently?
What if this was the year you stopped carrying their projections? And the weight of their pain?
What if this was the year you reclaimed the parts of yourself they taught you to hate?
No resolutions, no “new year, new you” nonsense—just the real you, stepping into a year that feels lighter, freer, and more like your own.
Here's how one student put it:
And I couldn’t leave out this short and sweet one:
Listen—I know it’s hard to believe things can get better, or that someone truly understands your pain and wants the best for you.
But I genuinely do.
It's a huge reason as to why I even created Protect Your Peace in the first place.
So, here’s where I leave you today: You can keep carrying their projections, believing their stories about who you are, and hoping it will somehow change.
Or, you can start recognizing their distortions for what they actually are and give yourself the love and acceptance they never could.
Remember, Protect Your Peace is a December-only masterclass—which means you only have 72 hours left before it’s gone until NEXT December. Sign up while you still can 💛
I’m here if you have any questions! Let's take you back. 💛
Morgan
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