You didn’t land here by accident.
Some part of you already knows the way you’ve been connecting with your partner isn’t working.
Beth knew that feeling too.
She grew up in a home where love had strings attached. Her mom’s rage could spark in an instant.
To survive, she learned to stay hyper-alert: scanning every detail, over-explaining, keeping one step ahead so she wouldn’t be blindsided.
By the time she was married, those same survival strategies were running her relationship.
She poured out her resentment and hurt in midnight texts, rehearsed every word to avoid a shutdown, and worked overtime to get him to see where he was getting it wrong.
When I asked why she signed up to work with me, she said: “I can’t keep doing this. It already feels unbearable. What do I have to lose by trying something different?”
So, she enrolled in How to Love After Childhood Trauma.
What We Worked On Together
As soon as Beth joined, I wanted to learn the exact moments that she felt most alone so we could start to get her some immediate relief.
For her, it was the unanswered texts, the quiet shutdowns, and the endless rehearsals / rumination in her head.
Together, we practiced how to:
➜ Soothe the panic in her body the moment it hit, so she could stop crumbling every time he pulled away.
➜ Anchor in the present, so instead of reliving her childhood helplessness, she could see she was her adult self in 2025 with her own ground to stand on and her own worth.
➜ Stop making silence mean she was unlovable and see it for what it was — his withdrawal, not her lovability measure.
With repeated practice of these initial skills, Beth quickly noticed something new: relief.
The relief of knowing how to soothe herself, even when he pulled away. Relief from the endless chase and the crushing belief that she was “too much" and "all alone" in this world.
And once she had that steadiness, the fear that used to haunt her — “What if I reach out and he doesn’t reach back?” — didn’t hold the same power, because she finally knew she could take care of herself through the hurt.
Creating Secure Love
That's when we turned to building secure love using new relationship skills.
It was clear to me that the first skill she needed was learning how to name her needs in a way her husband could actually hear.
For years, those needs came out tangled in panic, blame, or over-explaining — which only activated him, causing him to pull further away.
Together, we practiced identifying what her core needs actually were, and communicating them in a way that works.
We also added the Reality Anchor Exercise — a step-by-step way to check her perceptions against the present moment and affirm what was real, so she could start standing firmly in her needs, even if he didn’t agree with her.
It was after these two skills that Beth told me:
“For the first time, it felt like a partnership instead of a battle."
By no longer lashing out or over-explaining, Beth saw that her husband didn't go straight into defense mode.
Not only that, but by naming her real needs instead of masking them with criticism, control, or panic, Beth gave him the chance to take them in rather than shut down.
Because she wasn’t tangled in fear and he wasn’t locked in defense, their dynamic started to change in the small, everyday moments.
The more she regulated, the more he stayed in the room instead of walking away. And the more he stayed, the more steady she felt.
Over time, those small changes added up — made even stronger by the fact that she kept sharing small pieces of what she was learning in How to Love After Childhood Trauma with him.
This momentum is what finally gave Beth what she had been longing for all along — a steady, reciprocal love that didn’t depend on chasing or defending, but on actually meeting each other.
PS - When I checked in with Beth recently, she told me they still use the learnings from the program today.
I share her story often because it is what How to Love After Childhood Trauma is all about.
Not quick fixes, not chasing or controlling, but real skills that bring relief, rebuild trust in yourself, and create the conditions for secure love.
And yes, a lot of this science is already out there somewhere.
You could totally spend months buried in Google searches, juggling books, podcasts, therapy models, and Instagram posts — stitching together scraps of advice on your own.
Or you could skip the trial-and-error and join me in How to Love After Childhood Trauma — where you’ll get the exact skills Beth used, step by step, taught in a way that actually sticks, from someone who truly gets it.
Doors close in just two days, and I can't wait to see you at the live kickoff!
Forever on your side,
Morgan